Gay Men in Kpop

First I would like to start off by saying there’s nothing wrong with being gay. One of my family members is gay, and this person has more character, determination, and ambition than anyone I know. Not only has this person achieved more in his/her life than most people, he/she has been extremely generous to those who have accepted him/her. That being said, over the years the metrosexual look has become the new trend in K-pop. Usually, when I watch MTV, in the back of my mind I realize it’s just an act. But sometimes one of the members of the boy bands fits this extreme metrosexual role with much more ease than his fellow members. From what I have observed: mannerisms, speech patterns, intonations, and their interactions with the same and opposite sex, and after filtering it through my limited “gaydar,” I have concluded that these particular individuals are in fact gay. Gay, of course, means homosexual and according to the dictionary is “being sexually attracted to members of the same sex.” That’s it.

Some people have disregarded my conclusion saying they have girlfriends, they’re married, or they have children. Many of these entertainers do have girlfriends, many do get married, and some may even have children (rarely). But it still doesn’t mean they’re not gay. Once again “gay” means being sexually attracted to the same sex.

But let’s start with the “girlfriend” argument. It’s well known throughout the entertainment world that relationships between entertainers are used as publicity stunts. Don’t you think it’s more than a coincidence there are always rumors about the two co-stars of a film dating a couple of months before the release of the film? It’s used to increase the popularity and appeal of the film. If the co-stars aren’t actually dating, their agents or the producing company will “leak” the information. In the music industry, many artists, especially younger entertainers, hide their relationship out of fear of hurting their career. If the single female fans learned their “Mr. Right” is already taken, they may turn their eyes and ears elsewhere.

But even more damaging would be the truth about an entertainer’s homosexuality. If an entertainer whose fans were primarily young single women knew he was not attracted to them, their fantasy would be destroyed, and his career would take a dive. If you want an example, look up Lance Bass from Back Street Boys. If there are even hints whispered about a male entertainer’s homosexuality, all of a sudden he’s in a “serious relationship” with a female member of other music group. An example from k-pop would be Jo Kwon (2am) and Ga-In (Brown Eye Girls). The same can be said for the “he’s married” argument. The marriage may simply be another way to keep the façade alive, and ensure his future career and lavish lifestyle. Actually many of them have “a man on the side.

The tricky one is the “he has children” argument. I personally have met numerous gay men who have families. I don’t know the specifics about how their children were conceive because, well, I’ve never thought to ask, but I just want to highlight the fact that it’s possible. Clay Aiken was suspected of being gay though he always denied the allegation. However in 2008 he came out because he didn’t want to have his son live a lie.

At the moment Korean society seems to be rather conservative, especially when it comes to sexuality or “alternate lifestyles.” I even had one woman in my English class say there were no gay Korean men and the only gay people in Korea were from other countries. No joke! Then I proceeded to teach her the term “rice queen” but that’s other story. Koreans are known for their rapid change both economically and culturally. Many anticipate that the younger generation will be more open to homosexuality. There is a popular TV show in Korea title “Personal Preference” where a straight man is pretending to be gay. Programs like this are expected to shed some light on the gay population in Korea, hopefully a positive light. I hope that one day an entertainer’s fame and popularity will be based on his/her talent and ability rather than sex appeal, and these entertainers don’t feel the need to hide who they truly are.

Well in conclusion I would like to list some people in Kpop who I think are gay (homosexual). Once again I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being gay, and this is only spectulation.

Jo Kwon from “2am” (duh)
U-Kno from TVXQ (Dongbangshingi)
Jo Sung Mo – Ballad Singer
Hyun Joong from SS501

Ryeo Wook from Super Junior
Hee Chul from Super Junior
Eun Hyuk from Super Junior
Key from Shinee
Jong Hyun from Shinee

Eli from UKiss
Kevin from UKiss
Alexander from UKiss
Kibum from UKiss

And I going to go out on a limb and say:
Bi (Rain) from JYP
J.Y.Park-owner and founder of JYP talent agency

If I’m wrong, I’m sorry to put you on the spot. And congratulations; you fooled me.

Beautiful Today, Stupid Tomorrow

Many celebrities in the media are revered for their physical beauty such as Kim Ah Joong, Hyun Young, Moon Geun Young, etc. However many of them present themselves as unintelligent (more common among beautiful female entertainers than male). The reasons they do this is other discussion all together. The focus of this article is the potential connection between physical attractiveness and the lack of intelligence, and how society can promote its existence.

Everyone in America has heard of the stereotypical “dumb blonde,” and sure, there are plenty of examples throughout entertainment history, predominately in twentieth century television and film (Marilyn Monroe, Anna Nicole Smith, Paris Hilton, Pamela Anderson, Jessica Simpson, Dolly Parton, etc) who fed off of and further facilitated this stereotype. The stereotypes origins, however, may have come from a much more psychosocial dynamic rather than just an overgeneralization of people with a hair color originating from entertainment. The “dumb blonde stereotype” is one example of the premise that what is considered beautiful today may eventually be associated with stupidity and lack of character in the future.

It seems human nature to desire positive feedback from others along with having our basic needs met. In addition, we desire to have pride in the perception of what we think we are as individuals. To obtain these we complete with or compare ourselves to others. Each of us has natural characteristics which can be utilized to gain favor from others and successfully compete in different “arenas” (social status, employment, education, intelligence, social circles, and appearance) for things we desire. Throughout our lives, the positive feedback and resources we gain from others due to these characteristics may fuel our desire to improve only those characteristics and may lead to an isolated focus of improvement; meaning we focus on one personal characteristic to improve while neglecting others. Let’s take the example of beauty.

To digress away from the “dumb blonde” example, I would just like to focus on Korea. First consider the objective standards of feminine beauty in Korea; large eyes, narrow face, slender body, and large chest. If a woman at a young age possesses these physical qualities, people are naturally drawn to her, and give her positive feedback on these qualities and the resources she desires. In many cases she simply has handed to her anything she desires without much effort. There are even many comprehensive studies connecting perceived physical beauty and higher grades given by teacher’s (Ritts, Vicki, 1992). This is one example of the result of what social psychologists call the “halo effect (Thorndike, Edward L., 1920),” or the “beautiful is good stereotype (Eagly et al., 1991; Feingold, 1992; Jackson et al., 1995).” Even Aristotle said “personal beauty is a greater recommendation than any letter of reference.”

However, the woman’s environment would condition her to focus on her physical appearance. During her life she may devote a substantial amount of time and energy improving or sustaining this connection between her physical beauty and her “success” in life instead of developing other skills, abilities, or her intellectual capacity. As time progresses, the difference in intelligence and character development between her and others who don’t share her “natural physical appeal” may become substantial. This also may be true for men.


On the contrary, someone who does not possess such “beauty” would need to develop other characteristics to gain the things he/she desires. A person who is objectively unattractive may focus on education, or other personality characteristics. This might explain why we think people with glasses look smarter. In the past, people with glasses were not considered physically attractive (in general), so they focused on education/intelligence; and “arena” in which they can gain an advantage. Another possible example would be the Napoleon complex where a man of short stature will overcompensate in other areas of his life.

So in essence, our social environment could condition people gain or neglect certain personal characteristics. Someone who is coddled just because he/she is beautiful, and nothing else is required of them, may neglect improving intelligence and developing character. If this occurs on a large scale with a group of people who possess the current physical standards of beauty, those physical characteristics may become associated with a lack of intelligence. In closing, I’ll leave you with a proverb from Congo; “You may be beautiful, but learn to work, for you cannot eat your beauty.”


The author has been living in Korea since 2006; working primarily as an English teacher. He has a Bachelor's in Psychology and an Master's in Applied Psychology (Organizational Training and Development).


Posted in the KOREA TIMES 9/10/10

Eldery: Plague of the Subway

I give up! For the past two months I have been pushed, elbowed, grabbed, shoved, and received so many scowls from others that I’m beginning to regret ever entering the gauntlet we call ``line number 2.”

But yet again, I’m on the 5:45 a.m. subway to Gangnam. As I get on, nobody moves, everyone seems unwilling to give up their position near the door. Annoyed, I stare hard in the eyes of one of the gentlemen in my way. He begrudgingly moves to the side and lets me past. Hoping to cause myself little stress this morning, I go to the other side of the subway car away from opening doors.

We pass many stations with people constantly getting on meeting the same fate. As we stop at Seoul National University of Education Station, the group of people closest to the doors makes a small passage for the exiting passengers, but once they have exited, they quickly lunge at the closing doors; everyone bumping, pushing. The whole scene reminds me of eight-year-old elementary school students rushing to the classroom door and fighting for position to be the first one out.

Once everyone has adjusted themselves into position, the anticipation for the coming event creates a tense atmosphere. Then it happens, we stop and the doors to Gangnam open. Everyone rushes out like runners off the starting blocks. The pushing resumes within the crowd, as I calmly step out of the car, reluctant to join of the group. I stand back and look over the members of the group, trying to understand why they act with such discourtesy. But I notice something; a commonality. They are predominately elderly.

To read the full article, go to the Korean Times website.